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- Apr 28, 2006
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How To Get Kicked Out
Of Your Gym In Ten
Days Or Less!
Day 1
Bring your own music use a boom box and turn
it up to inspiration levels and start working out. ACDCs
Thunderstruck should do the trick.
Day 2
Set up a circuit like one of my typical
Workouts of the Day and put a sign up at each
station advising others that this equipment is
reserved for accurate timing of your effort.
Day 3
While practicing the Olympic lifts drop a max load
from overhead. This may do it right here.
Day 4
Find a twenty-inch platform and perform box
jumps. Try three sets of two minutes of max jumps.
Bizarrely, this one irks the heck out of most gym
management.
Day 5
Take a pair of dumbbells out into the parking lot to
do walking lunges. You may be accused of theft.
Day 6
Bring several powerlifting buddies to do some super
heavy deadlifts. Dont forget to grunt, scream, and
use chalk!
Day 7
If the gym has support poles climb them. If
not find something to climb; sling a rope over
a beam or rafters, attach some climbing holds
to the wall and use them. You wont get to the
climbing part if you need to attach anything.
You may get stopped at the door coming in
with a twenty-five foot coil of two-inch rope.
Day 8
Workout with your shirt off. If you dont get a reaction
have your girlfriend or wife take hers off.
Day 9
Walk on your hands, or do handstand push-ups or
some other basic gymnastics stuff.
Day 10
If youve gotten this far, this one is the clincher.
Record your efforts by writing them on the wall.
If after day ten you are still allowed in,
you belong to a great gym. Let me know
where it is!
Of Your Gym In Ten
Days Or Less!
Day 1
Bring your own music use a boom box and turn
it up to inspiration levels and start working out. ACDCs
Thunderstruck should do the trick.
Day 2
Set up a circuit like one of my typical
Workouts of the Day and put a sign up at each
station advising others that this equipment is
reserved for accurate timing of your effort.
Day 3
While practicing the Olympic lifts drop a max load
from overhead. This may do it right here.
Day 4
Find a twenty-inch platform and perform box
jumps. Try three sets of two minutes of max jumps.
Bizarrely, this one irks the heck out of most gym
management.
Day 5
Take a pair of dumbbells out into the parking lot to
do walking lunges. You may be accused of theft.
Day 6
Bring several powerlifting buddies to do some super
heavy deadlifts. Dont forget to grunt, scream, and
use chalk!
Day 7
If the gym has support poles climb them. If
not find something to climb; sling a rope over
a beam or rafters, attach some climbing holds
to the wall and use them. You wont get to the
climbing part if you need to attach anything.
You may get stopped at the door coming in
with a twenty-five foot coil of two-inch rope.
Day 8
Workout with your shirt off. If you dont get a reaction
have your girlfriend or wife take hers off.
Day 9
Walk on your hands, or do handstand push-ups or
some other basic gymnastics stuff.
Day 10
If youve gotten this far, this one is the clincher.
Record your efforts by writing them on the wall.
If after day ten you are still allowed in,
you belong to a great gym. Let me know
where it is!